Only Partly Uncensored

500

In Mouthy Broad, Q & A on January 11, 2013 at 1:31 pm

I can’t believe I’m writing this post.

500 published, as soon as I hit the little blue button.

Which means we both get subjected to 50 more random things (and some of them are even about me), as of this moment. I’m subjected to writing them, and you, my darlings, are subjected to the reading!

  1. I still, still, want to teach college.
  2. I can’t decide if I love or hate my job, but I have decided that it feels too small for me.
  3. My idealism gets me into more trouble than my brutal approach to honesty does – which is no small feat.
  4. In spite of the fact that this blog has been invaded and violated, I’m happy I still have it.
  5. I’m happier that I refuse to give it up, no matter how many invasions and violations I have to live through to keep it.
  6. I stopped watching Bones sometime between seasons 4 and 5, but have started again and am completely addicted.
  7. Two and a half years after moving back to where I’m from, I still haven’t made any real friends.
  8. I miss my mother. This surprises me for lots of reasons.
  9. Sharkman is 10, for those of you keeping track. Double digits are scary.
  10. In March, it will have been three years since Rhett and Jolie decided to say “Fuck it all” and live happily ever after.
  11. I’m playing hooky from work for an extra hour to write this, which balances out since I have to be there two hours late anyway.
  12. Almost eight years after I [edited for inappropriate exmarital referential content] started time-sharing my son, Sharkman’s weekend departures still leave me with a sick feeling in my stomach. Don’t let’s even mention the longer visits over vacations.
  13. Red is still my favorite color, but I almost never wear it.
  14. I’m 40 pounds heavier than I want to be, and still, most people guess I weigh 50 pounds less than I do.
  15. I adore my puppydog, Moose, but not even he can convince me it’s worth ever having another male dog.
  16. I’ve made absolutely no progress toward being more patient with douchebags. Quite the opposite, in fact.
  17. Filing for bankruptcy beats the hell out of the alternative.
  18. Seeing the justice system at work is not at all the same thing as seeing justice done.
  19. Narcotics are not even kind of good for my digestive system.
  20. 30something is far too old to have your first invasive dental procedure.
  21. Conversion is much more difficult and complicated than I expected it to be, also for lots of reasons.
  22. Watching Sharkman grow up and away from me brings me more joy and more pain that I could have ever imagined.
  23. If my twenties were my socially antagonistic decade, my thirties must be my socially unacceptable decade.
  24. I really, truly, suck at being patient.
  25. I still don’t really think I’m much good at relationships. Rhett still argues with me every time I say that.
  26. I’m grateful to have had the chance to move back here and lay some of these old ghosts to rest.
  27. I wish the exorcism was taking a little less time.
  28. I still suck at living in this moment, rather than pushing to schedule the next one full of more stuff.
  29. Whatever it takes, I will get Sharkman into a place where he has better opportunities than I did.
  30. I’d rather have root canal than ever have to call the IRS again.
  31. I want to write a book.
  32. I’ve never had breakup sex.
  33. There are never, ever enough hours in the day.
  34. Caretaking is not my best thing, in spite of what the universe seems to think.
  35. I might be coming down with the flu.
  36. I’ve been sick more since going to work for a big box retailer than I have ever been in my entire life.
  37. The older my grandfather gets, the more Irish he gets. I wonder if that will happen to me.
  38. I’m going to a doctor at the end of the month to look into baby #2 in more detail.
  39. I live in a state that allows second parent adoption. This is an amazing blessing, and amounts to small mountains of paperwork.
  40. I love quotes, and have an entire bulletin board full of them in my office.
  41. When I remember to stop and read my quotes, they help me get through the day.
  42. Nothing is more messy or complex than an ordinary life.
  43. Ten year old boys are all only one step removed from Pigpen.
  44. I don’t like football as much as I thought I did. I didn’t know that until I became a football mom.
  45. Every single one of my sports teams let me down this year.
  46. There is a level of Hell that strongly resembles the DMV.
  47. These stupid numerical posts aren’t getting any easier to write, but I know somewhere, deep down, that they’re good exercises.
  48. The definition of a good friend is someone who can tell you something that pisses you off, and you still find yourself listening to them.
  49. I’d rather have root canal than do another interview.
  50. I have to do 120 interviews in the next two months.

Whew.

That’s it. I’m out.

 

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  1. congrats on 500, gorgeous girl!

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